How not to lose your head

I could tell Ralph just wasn't getting it.

Ralph - not his real name - had been interviewing me on live Christian radio for the previous 25 minutes about my new book, Too Blessed to be Stressed. Ralph was broadcasting from a station in the northeast and I've got to give him points for taking on the daunting task of a man interviewing a female author about a woman's book.

My publicist had sent him a copy of Too Blessed, but my first clue that he hadn't read my book was when he kept popping out questions like, "But what about men?" or "Don't you think men get stressed too?" when I'd relate some tidbit making a point about women's stress issues.

This was a women's book, for pity's sake. 

Then came the coup de grace.

With five minutes left of the interview, I could practically hear Ralph flipping pages, searching frantically for a final question to end with a bang. With relief in his voice to have finally hit upon a topic with which he felt comfortable, he said, "Oh, look - I see you've written a chapter about Martin Luther. Go ahead now and tell us about 'Luther's Legacy.'"

Gulp.

How on earth was I to tell this guy that Luther was a monkey. No, really. A ringtail capuchin monkey. And the chapter entitled "Luther's Legacy" was about little hairy Luther's human owner's unconditional love for him despite his propensity for creating constant trouble for himself. Not unlike the unconditional love our heavenly father shows toward us.

Oh, man. I shot up a rhino-in-the-road prayer for help. How was I going to get out of this one without a car wreck?

A half-dozen ways to handle the situation flashed through my head during the momentary gap of silence that followed. But as you know, silence on live radio is a BIG problem. So I decided to go with my first impulse to simply laugh about it.

"Ha-ha!" (what I hoped was a pleasant and not desperate laugh.) "Well, Ralph, there were no theses or nails involved with this Luther. He was, in fact, a monkey."

Thankfully, although Ralph was silent at first, he eventually saw the humor in the situation as I imparted some of Luther's crazy exploits and we ended on a light, companionable note.

Vehicle swirved. Wreck avoided. Thanks, Lord.

Media interviews can be hairy, for sure. Although part of the package sent to the newspaper reporter, radio host or TV interviewer contains "suggested questions" that you've compiled (and studied ahead of time and conveniently know the answers to!), it's been my experience that they're rarely ever covered. I don't know if interviewers resist being told what to ask and prefer to wing it, but I can only remember a few times when we actually got past the first suggested question before the interviewer ventured into uncharted territory.

Even when they haven't read the book, which is the majority of the time.

A good interviewer can fake it well, having previously acquainted themselves with the fast-read stuff: the foreword, back cover copy, endorsements and table of contents to get the gist of the material. They might even thumb through a random chapter or two and highlight a few points that struck them.

But they're depending on you, the author, to grab whatever ball they toss out and run with it, adding your own interesting and preferably humorous tidbits and sound bites. And the shorter the interview, the sharper and deeper the sound bites need to be.

That's why, particularly for radio interviews conducted by telephone, most authors surround themselves with cheat sheets from which they can draw clever and pertinent zingers to redirect most any question to. We may not have the answer to the specific question the host asks, but we have a good answer to some question and if we skillfully redirect our answer to our prepared response, the listener is satisfied, the host is happy, and we end up looking like we halfway know what we're talking about.

The key is to compile easily accessible main points from your book and keep referring back to those when off-the-wall questions throw you for a loop.

I finally wised up with Too Blessed to be Stressed (after fumbling inanely through my last 3 books searching for info I couldn't seem to locate during interviews). I tabbed and labeled key points. Now I can flip right to whatever it is I'm looking for, no muss, no fuss. And no embarrassing air silences which I have to end by saying, "Well, golly, I can't seem to find it, but I think I said ..."

So what about you? I'd love to hear your stories. How do you get out of hairy situations without making a monkey out of yourself?




 

Everyday Miracles

I lunched with an aspiring writer friend today and her personal story really resonated with me. I bet it will with you, too.

Anna's (name changed) husband has been out of work for four long years, forcing Anna, previously a stay-at-home-mom of two, to return to the work force. Thus her longtime writing dream was necessarily shelved for the time being and Anna began cutting cost corners wherever she could.

During this "faith journey" as Anna refers to the last four years, she has been astounded how God took care of the needs of her family when solutions seemed out of reach. Human reach!

Like the time she had just finished pulling together tuna helper for dinner again, wondering aloud to God when it would ever end. Just as they sat down to eat, the doorbell rang. Standing there holding a huge roast and platter of potatoes was an acquaintaince - not really a friend - whom Anna barely knew.

"Just brought you a little something," she said. No explanation. No harp arpeggios. No rustle of angel wings.

Or when Anna's son wore a hole through his sneakers. "Let's try to make them last just a little longer," Anna whispered, knowing the monthly budget was already stretched to the breaking point.

The next day, a neighbor boy two years older appeared at the kitchen door holding a brand new pair of sneakers just the right size. "We're packing up to move and I found these in my closet. They hurt my feet so I never wore them - do you want them?"

Coincidences? Of course not. Everyday miracles from a Heavenly Father who cares.

I think similar everyday miracles occur in our writing lives as well. During those l-o-n-g waits for editors to respond to submitted manuscripts, when that book title just won't materialize in our brains, after receiving a royalty check for $4.36 ...

Papa God finds innovative ways to encourage us through everyday miracles. What everyday miracles have you seen?

Secret Agent Writer

What is it about calling ourselves a writer that makes the liver quiver and face turn the color of ripe tomatoes?

Last weekend, while visiting an out-of-town church where I had just done a speaking presentation the day before, I was approached by a doe-eyed, 30-something woman in a crowded room.

"Hi. I'm Ellen."

"Hi, Ellen, I'm Debbie."

"I know who you are. And I know what you do."

"What I do?" The way she said it made me wonder which of my secret vices she was privy to.

"Yes. I want to ask you a question." Ellen's eyes darted covertly around the room. She stepped closer and lowered her voice. "I ... I'm going to a writer's workshop in a few weeks and want to know how I should prepare."

"Oh, really? So you're a writer, too?" My voice mirrored my enthusiasm in meeting a kindred spirit.

Ellen's face flushed and she raised both hands as if fending off a blow. "Shhh." She glanced nervously around and whispered, "Nobody knows. And I don't want them to."

I had to smile. I remembered all too well my early writing days when I, too, was a secret agent writer, fearful of being judged and found wanting. Fearful that by exerting my meager literary skills, people would deem me cheeky, impudent, unaware of my limited abilities.

I didn't tell anyone until after my third magazine article was published - not even my own mother. (Perhaps that had something to do with her always correcting my grammar, even as an adult.) It was a good year into my secretive career before I stopped correcting people who called me a writer.

"Oh, no - I'm not a real writer. I'm just a story-teller."

It's a process to admit - even to yourself - that you're a writer. We're not sure what the term actually encompasses and we're hesitant to label ourselves with so austere a title. But I've come to realize that being a writer has less to do with external justification (whether we're published or not) and more to do with internal fortitude.

If you can't not write, honey, you're a writer. Admit it. Accept it. Embrace it.

(Be sure to check out the excellent chapter about dealing with preparing for writer's conferences in Grit for the Oyster: 250 Pearls of Wisdom for Aspiring Writers, beginning on page 207.)

It's a gift!

A few nuggets of wisdom from highly successful inspirational writers:

"If you're a new writer, just starting out on this incredible journey, face the fact that it easily can be a one-step forward, two-steps backward adventure.

Fortify yourself with plenty of prayer, patience, and perseverance - unless you're the exception, you'll eventually need a lion's share of each. Be prepared to deal with the bitter as well as the sweet. But don't let the frustrations and disappointments ever overshadow your joy in and your apprciation for tthe git you've been given.

And don't forget that it is a gift. Nothing more, nothing less."
~ BJ Hoff, best-selling author

" I used to compartmentalize my writing from my Christian life. I wrote secular romances with sex and profanity, and because I was publishing everything I wrote, I told myself God was blessing it. But He wasn't.

God never blesses sin, and my writing was not only sinful, I believe it led others into sin. After 32 books published, the Lord orchestrated things in my life to draw me back to Him. I finally realized that He wants every area of our lives. He had given me the gift of writing so that I could glorify Him, but I was using that gift to do just the opposite.

I got down on my knees and repented and told the Lord I didn't want to write anything else that didn't glorify Him. Since that time, He has blessed my work immensely. I wish I'd committed my writing to Him years earlier."
~ Terri Blackstock, best-selling author